Saturday, January 9, 2010

Why, Why, Why?

It's not that I think that I am anything close to resembling perfect, nor do I think that females are the better gender. But, why does it sometimes feel like women have to be so on top of things because men just aren't? I'm not speaking for anyone here since I have no idea what goes on in other people's lives; this is just me venting. I know many people keep their blogs surface level & don't drag certain personal issues into play, but that's just not how I work. I like to keep it real! Because even when lives appear perfect in blog posts & pictures, we're all still dealing with similar frustrations.

I have definitely accepted the fact that I am a bit of a perfectionist when it comes to the appearance & cleanliness of my house, though I am trying to lighten up & relax a bit more. But, there are some days I feel that laundry would never be washed if I didn't take the initiative to do it & we'd be crawling over the rubble of baby toys & daily clutter if I wasn't here to pick it up. I sometimes tell Mike that I wish I could swap brains with him from time to time; things would be so much more peaceful & calm. Instead my brain is usually going a million miles a second, constantly processing what needs to get done next. It can get quite ugly in there!

I just wish that men would take a look around, see what needs to get done & JUST DO IT instead of asking, "so, what needs to get done next?" Uh, we both live here! In our home, we do end up doing 50/50, but I'm usually the one to initiate what needs to get done & keep things moving along. And this post is not written to bash my husband since in reality, he is an amazing dad & husband & would do anything for our family. This is just me blowing of a little steam!

Do any of you ladies out there deal with similar issues? What does your spouse do that irks you the most?

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  1. You are preaching to the choir, Sista! You are not alone... feel free to vent anytime! :)

  2. You are so not along... I too wish my husband would just do things because they need to get done not because i ask... like take the trash out... or pick up the baby toys at the end of the night instead of walking over them... just the little things...
    So for one second do not think that you are alone... I think it's MEN in general...

  3. i hear that all the time, "what can I do for you?" for me??? ummm hello? is this not your house? do you not live here as well for the past 2+ years? i am a complete wife in chief by necessity...and ready to resign from my position. however i would soon be buried in dust, cat hair, dirty diapers and toys. so i guess i will continue to reign as wife in chief until the end of time...

  4. however, i did read in the book "i was a good mom before i had kids" that really we should take a hint from men and actually take time to relax and not stress about everything. BUT i think the reason they can relax and not stress is because they are USUALLY not the primary caregiver, errand runner, grocery buyer, food cooker, laundry washer, house cleaner, appointment maker, social life scheduler, etc...i would be relaxed too if i didnt have to do any of that. (p.s. add to that cat vomit cleaner upper, my cat just hurled and i cleaned it up while husband sat on couch playing Wii.)

  5. Oh ladies. We are all in agreement on this one. Men are just wired differently than us. They don't think a few dishes in the sink or toys on the floor is a big deal. Mike has gotten better about pitching in especially since he started his new job but I still have to "ask" him to do the little things. Which gets irritating. What irritates me most is when he has to ask where I keep something. Is he kidding?

    BTW- I applaud your venting Allison! I don't vent enough. I've been neglecting my personal blog... Random Ramblings. Most of my time and energy goes into the always happy & positive family blog that my parents read. :)

  6. Well thanks for reminding me that I'm not alone! If Mike put half the energy & interest into our house as he did video games, we'd be in awesome shape! :o) Love you, Mike!

    And Mel, I was just checking in on your personal blog & was disappointed that you hadn't updated in a while. Hoping for some new posts soon!!

  7. You know I don't have much to complain about in this department. Just know that I'm hear if you want to vent. Love you!


  8. I think your husband is awesome and quite humorous, and goes above and beyond when called upon. You're lucky to be married to him, I'd marry him in seconds.

    Harriett the Hussy
    (i.e. Perno)

  9. This is all bullshit, you ladies need to calm down. Your constant need to clean is causing you to miss the most important things in life, like time with your HUSBANDS and KIDS. Men are wired differently? You bet your ass.. ;D

  10. What are you people talking about? I've been to all of your houses, and I think you all are filthy. I carry sanitizer with me when ever I visit any of you so that I can immediately sanitize my hands and kill all of the germs and bacteria before I enter my automobile.

  11. Before I met Kelly we both lived on our own and were self-sufficient. If cleaning needed to be done, it was up to me to get done, if laundry needed to be done again up to me, grocery shopping, paying bills, vacuuming all my responsibility. With Kelly in the same position when we moved in together it was easy, and natural to split duties around the house. With Mike, I’m not positive on this, I think he went from High school, to living in a dorm, and then moving in with you and never lived by himself. So he never had that valuable experience that could really help out now. Ultimately, he is the same person you married, is a great father, and husband and probably the hairiest individual I ever met, yeah I went there. You COULD be venting that he isn’t doing anything around the house and after a full days work YOU have to do everything, which is a position a lot of women find themselves in. Luckily all you have to do is just tell him what to do and he does it. Look at it this way, in a couple years you both are going to be able to sit on the couch and watch Cam do all the chores. Those will be the days!