Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Patience
Being the parent of a toddler is not always easy. Wow. Not at all. There are some days I just want to pull my hair out in frustration over the the whining, tantrums & lack of listening. I try my best to keep my patience & be the best mom I can be, but some days it's a struggle. Since Cam is our only child as of now & he didn't happen to come with an instruction manual, I'm trying to use my best judgment & discipline him as best as possible. I read parenting books/magazines when I have time, but kids throw you for a loop regardless of how many things your read or watch. Luckily Mike is an amazingly wonderful dad & we're constantly bouncing ideas & thoughts off each other when it comes to disciplining Cam.
Lately Cam has really been trying our patience when it comes to taking a nap without a fuss, getting into the bath without a fuss & going to bed without a fuss. Forget eating at the kitchen table since he certainly doesn't want to bother with that. I know he doesn't always have it easy since he spends so many hours each week at daycare, so I do try to cut him some slack without being a pushover. But it's a very fine line & not always easy to keep the balance or know I'm doing the right or wrong thing. I want Cam to take me seriously as a parent, so I don't want to say something & then back down, letting him get his way. And I'm always wondering, Is Cam a normal two year old or is he extra whiny?
It's also been interesting to find that since becoming a parent, I've noticed that so many random people feel inclined to give advice or pass judgment on the way Cam happens to be behaving (or rather, misbehaving). Some of this may be in my head since I can be sensitive, but other times people are down right rude. I can be my own worse critic & since being a mom is my most important job, I'm constantly scrutinizing my performance & questioning my decisions. But, I realize that despite all the advice or books or parenting magazines I read, it's going to come down to trial & error & taking it one day at a time & one challenge at a time. I just hope & pray that when Cam is an adult, he'll be able to look back at his childhood & honestly say, Wow, my mom did a really great job. I want him to respect me as not only a parent, but a person. And I want him to grow to be a wonderful person with strong values & respect for others. And it's my job to help guide him in that direction.
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I'm sorry that toddlerhood has been rough so far. I wish I had good advice for you. I'll be the one looking to you for toddler advice in a year or so. I have no doubt that Cam will grow up to be a wonderful, caring, fun, and smart adult. He's got great parents to learn from.
ReplyDeleteDiscipline is a tough issue. Strategies have to evolve as kids grow. Cam will keep you on your toes even past his toddler years. Right now we're using marble jars, a sticker chart & age appropriate time-outs. For major penalties we take away privilages. Electronics for Maddy, tv time for Mikayla. They test my patience in some way every day and it's because they have minds of their own. My girls always have something to say about meals, shower times, homework, picking up their messes, bedtimes... you name it they have an opinion. Sometimes, I see their teenage years flash before my eyes... Yikes! Cam's body & his brain are growing exponentially right now. Like you said, it's trial & error and sometimes you just have to wing it, but no matter what you always have his best interests & care at heart. Just for the record, my nephew is awesome and so are his parents. :)
ReplyDeleteCam will most certainly remember you as being a great mom! You obviously love him, and spend as much time as you can with him! As a teacher of teenagers, those are the biggest needs I see... Kids need to know their parents love them, and they need parents who are involved in their life and know what is going on (and are willing to discipline them when necessary). The fact that you are searching for the best solutions, and care enough for this stuff to bother you, shows you are a great mommy! :)
ReplyDeleteParenting a toddler is tough! One minute they are an angel, the next a holy terror. ;) My mom has always said that consistency is key and I definitely agree. Hang in there!
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