The To "NOT" Do List

We're in the middle of a new series at church called Stuck, which is discussing the fact that many people are stuck in a rut & feel there is no way out. There are three categories in life that you may find yourself: The Dream Zone, The Drained Zone & The Danger Zone. God, of course, wants to find all of us living within the Dream Zone where you have a passion for Jesus & life. Unfortunately the majority of people fall within the Drained Zone; myself included.

Jesus died for our sins to give us a chance at a FULL life. Instead, so many of us are going through the motions each day, feeling frustrated, drained & stressed, only to wake up the next morning & repeat the same, negative actions all over again. We lie to ourselves when we say, "things will eventually slow down." Because if we continue doing exactly what we've always done, how will our lives change? How will things slow down?

We say yes to so many commitments & obligations & stretch ourselves so thin because we're afraid of letting people down. I know I'm guilty of living in fear of what people will think of me if I say no to a request, if I don't stay late at work when it's expected of me. We fill our days to the brim & feel that this whirlwind of activity equates to a meaningful life. We're never without our cellphones or computers; we're always available for calls, e-mails & text messages. We're pulled in so many directions that the days, weeks & months can pass & your thoughts get so distorted because you haven't had the chance to take a deep breath & actually enjoy life.

Instead of just saying, "things will eventually calm down... after Christmas, after the project is wrapped up at work," etc, we need to get our priorities straight. And what should our priorities be?

1) Our relationship with God. Taking time for prayer, reading the Bible, going to church; whatever it is you have to do to strengthen your relationship with God.

2) Your relationship with your spouse. When you're busy & not giving your marriage enough care & attention, things can slowly fall apart before you even realized there was a problem. We come home from work with so much to do around the house, dinners to be made, children to be bathed & put to bed that by the time we do have a second of downtime, we're too tired to put forth the effort to reconnect with our spouses.

3) Our children. This can be a tough one to wrap your head around since many parents feel guilty if their children aren't the #1 priority. I know that I guilt myself into thinking that I'm never doing enough as a parent. But, when you let your relationship with God & your spouse fall to the wayside, you'll never be the best parent you can be.

4) Our purpose/careers. It can be very difficult to put this last since we spend so much time each week at work. It's easy to get wrapped up in work, especially when the economy is in a bad spot & we're thankful to even have a job.

I for one know that I need to shift my priorities & give more of myself to God, to Mike & to Cameron, instead of coming home from work haggard & stressed with my mind so full that I can't see reality clearly. It's okay to say no to commitments in order to have that extra breathing room. Yes, you may let someone down, but in the grand scheme of things, it will make you a better person; the person that God put you on this Earth to be.

Praying for Stellan

I've blogged about Stellan before, but I'm hoping you could please say a prayer for him as he is in the hospital again, battling with SVT. Today also happens to be his first birthday & my heart absolutely goes out to his family. We celebrated Cameron's first birthday just one month ago & I cannot fathom it being spent standing over his bed in the PICU. God, I pray that you give Stellan the strength to fight this battle as he has before & allow him to go home with his family to have a true birthday celebration. I pray that you also give his family the strength they need to get through this horrible time. Bless Stellan & allow him to have MANY birthday cakes ahead.

Quotes That Speak to Me

I recently saw this quote & immediately fell in love with it since I sometimes feel like I'm monitoring what I say to make others happy vs. being true to myself. Dr. Seuss is a flippin' genius!

"Be who you are & say what you feel because those who mind don't matter & those who matter don't mind."

Another great one that I love which would be perfect as a wonderful vacation is ending & you're heading back home to reality:

"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened."

Time. Or lack thereof.

As thoughts were racing through my head this morning as I sat at my desk at work, one of them included the fact that I haven't blogged in quite some time. Which brings me to the idea of this post! The series we're currently discussing at church is called "Living on the Edge" which discusses the idea that we are basically pushed to the edge in many aspects of our lives. This series came at a perfect time for me, as I'm sure it has for many, many other people, as I feel as I'm being pulled in a million different directions and stretched so thin. Most weeks I feel as if I'm just trying to survive and that is NOT how I want to live my life.

The point of Sunday's message was that God gives us our time & is the only one who knows how much we have left. With that said, many of us don't make time in our lives to put God as one of our priorities. I know that I am one of those people. As I mentioned before, so much of my day feels like survival mode that I'm not able to see things clearly or to gain perspective on what's actually important. As our Pastor, Brian said, we have such a go, go, go mentality that we fear that we may "fall behind." But, fall behind what?? We also discussed "type A" personality which category I surely fall into, where I feel like I ALWAYS have to be productive, I ALWAYS have to be multitasking. It gets so tiring sometimes & when my brain is so tired, my focus is so distorted & the things that should be important in my life go to the wayside.

Lately I really am trying to relax and be more present for my family. As I sat at the dinner table with Mike & Cameron last week & noticed the fifty things that needed to be done in the house, I continued to talk, laugh & sit because I know that Cameron will only be eleven & a half months old once & we don't have endless time to enjoy him at this stage. For all I know, I could be gone from this Earth tomorrow.

I just have to keep reminding myself to stop, take a deep breath & gain a bit of perspective. Brian suggested that we take a small amount of time each day to read a chapter, or even less, of the Bible & this is exactly what I plan to do. Hopefully this will help remind me that life is so much more than struggling to "make it through" each day.

Every Bit Helps

The fact that I use anywhere from one to three twenty ounce Styrofoam cups each day at work has really been weighing on me. I'm always trying to do little things to make a difference in improving our environment & this overuse of Styrofoam was certainly not helping!

So, Mike and I decided that we were going to switch to reusable plastic bottles instead & I'm feeling very good about the change. Many of the bottles that I looked at had very small openings which I didn't like since I add tons of ice to my water, but this bottle works perfectly under the ice dispenser at work. As I leave work & head to the gym, I refill my bottle for my workout, wash it when I get home, pop it back in my purse & bring it back to work for another day of fun!

My therapy

Last week was extremely hectic so I was unable to hit the gym at all. I realized just how important it is that I work out consistently since I found that I had an even worse body image than I normally have. It seems that when I workout 3-4 days a week, I'm much more confident in myself; it's easier to choose clothes for the day & I don't cringe when I'm looking in the mirror.

When I joined the track team as a freshman in high school & was forced to wear teeny, tiny shorts, I decided then & there that I was going to lose weight. I'm the type of person that goes full force when I set my mind to something. This can be a positive or negative trait. Unfortunately in this instance, it was very negative. I basically stopped eating altogether & exercised compulsively. I lost nearly 40 pounds from the start of the second semester of my freshman year to the first semester of my sophomore year. As the tennis season began, I was basically unrecognizable to my teammates. That's when some started to "monitor" me; the football coach who happened to be my biology teacher would check my lunch bag before & after each lunch period to make sure I ate & he would report back to my tennis coach. But at this same time, many people commented on how "great I looked." Yeah right; that just proves how warped people's ideas are of what is considered attractive.

As sad as this sounds, I found that it was very easy to starve myself. My mom & dad worked long hours & came home well past dinnertime so it was very easy to say, "yeah, I ate" when they asked. My sickness became very bad when I would be doubled over with the most intense stomach cramps imaginable just because I ate something containing a bit of fat. My body just wasn't used to digesting it. This may be a bit TMI, but I even stopped getting my period for a year since my BMI was below normal.

Thankfully, I slowly began to overcome this insane way of living (if you want to call it that) & gradually, I ate healthier & gained weight. I did this with zero professional help. I think the turning point was when I truly realized just how consumed I was by this; there was no possible way I could keep this up when I was older & had a family. It was all I thought about. I could tell you the calorie content of any food named. My life literally revolved around what I ate (or didn't eat) & how much I exercised.

This obsession is what drew me to my profession as a registered dietitian. I was shocked as I sat in my first nutrition class & heard my teacher say that 60% of RDs have once had or have an eating disorder. It makes sense if you think about it.

I am so happy to say that I no longer abuse my body in such a way; instead I strive to treat my body with respect by eating healthy & working out. However, it is very sad that at times I still struggle with such a negative self image; probably on a weekly basis. I am now 30 years old, so I will continue to work on overcoming this; I am tired of wasting time on such meaningless thoughts. I refuse to look back at my life & realize what a shame it was to expend so much negative energy on disliking the way I look. Not only that, but when I'm feeling negative about the way I look, my entire attitude is poor.

So, my goal is to continue to eat a well balanced diet & exercise 3-4 days a week in order to have a strong, healthy body. Cam deserves to have a mom with a positive self image who teaches him to grow to be a self-assured adult.

Beauty

Just thought I'd share a picture of the rose that was given to us at church last week. I have mixed emotions about flowers because I love their beauty but hate to think about them slowly dying. So I took a picture of it at it's most vibrant point so that I could hold on to the beauty of it.

One of my many pet peeves!

So, since I've been on the subject of working out & joining a gym, I just thought I'd gripe about something that bugged the hell out of me Monday when I was lifting weights. I was at Shapes, listening to my IPod & minding my own business (okay, well maybe not..) when I saw another gym member approach a personal trainer & ask her about nutrition. Needless to say my ears perked up since I'm a registered dietitian.

Well, this woman, let's call her W, asks the trainer, let's call her T what she should do since she's stuck at a point where she isn't losing additional weight. T asks W what her diet is like & when W says, "I have shredded wheat for breakfast" T immediately says, "you need to stop that, grains turn right to sugar. Oh, & I personally follow a no dairy diet." UGHHHHGHH! Seriously, I could feel my blood pressure rise as I held back the urge to shout, "listen here, you freaking idiot, you have absolutely NO right to be dishing out nutrition information to the public when you have absolutely no degree to back it up. AND what you're saying is absolute crap!"

To top it off, I happened to be talking to one of the respiratory therapists at work today who mentioned that a trainer at her gym told her not to eat more than 2 pieces of fruit/day. When I asked her if it was Shapes, she said yes! Let's use some common sense & realize that shredded wheat & fruit are not the culprits of the massive problem our country has with obesity!!!!!

I went to school for 4 years to get my B.S. in Nutrition & Dietetics & then moved on to a 2 year dietetic internship, so it REALLY annoys me when I listen to some Joe-Schmo dish out information that is not accurate. SO, to everyone out there, eat fruit, eat shredded wheat with low-fat or fat-free milk & focus on eating in moderation. I think it's the growing portion sizes & inactivity that's the problem. Not grains "that turn to sugar."

Thank you for letting me vent. That is all. For now.

Praying for Stellan

I have been following the blog, My Charming Kids for many, many months. MckMama, as she fondly goes by, has 4 children; Stellan, the youngest, was diagnosed with SVT or rapid heart rate while in utero at 20 weeks gestation. The doctors told MckMama & her husband that Stellan would not survive the pregnancy. Miraculously, he was born with no further signs of SVT. However, at 4 months of age, he again developed SVT.

Stellan is now almost 9 months old & doing very poorly at the moment. This story has really struck a nerve for me since my baby boy is only one month older & I cannot fathom going through such heartache & pain. Please say extra prayers for Stellan & his family. God, please give Stellan the strength to pull through this! Stellan beat all the odds that were stacked against him when he was in utero & can do this again!

Renewing our vows

We had a wonderful morning at Church of the Suncoast today as we were all able to renew our wedding vows. All the women had to gather in the back and the men waited at the front with roses in hand. As the women met their spouses in the front, we had to look into each others eyes & say our vows to one another. We promised to put God as #1 in our lives and our marriage as #2 because without our faith in God, our marriage cannot have the strong foundation it needs. We were told that couples who pray together have a less than 1% chance of divorce. That is something I would love to do at least once a week with Mike.

During this morning's service, we also discussed the importance of confiding & not hiding; when we keep secrets from one another intimacy dies. Some may feel there is "something" missing from your marriage & you may not be able to even put your finger on what it may be; loss of passion? a weak connection? We were advised to open up to one another by: 1) Confessing our secrets, 2) Receiving any confession with grace, 3) Praying together & 4) Committing to the healing journey together.

Not everyone has major confessions, but a lot of us keep "little" things to ourselves such as the extra, maybe unnecessary purchase we made at the store, etc. I know there are things I keep from Mike; the guilt I may feel when he gets up with Cam in the morning and lets me sleep. For some reason, this sort of thing always makes me anxious. I don't think Mike realizes how much guilt I feel on a day-to-day basis; I guess I always assume this is my issue & I need to work on it on my own. But, maybe if I let Mike in on my feelings, he can help me deal with it & get to the root of what is causing this.

After attending today's service, it made me realize that it's silly to keep feelings from Mike. Not only will it benefit me by getting a load off my chest, but Mike can potentially help me shed light on the situation.

Because I've been married for seven years now, I found today's service at Church of the Suncoast to be very interesting & it gave me a lot to think about. The current series is called The Vow which discusses the fact that wedding vows are more than just the declaration of love. It was said that marriage should not be thought of as a contract which is based on mutual DIStrust, rather it should be a covenant which is a mutual commitment. When we say our vows, we use the words, "for better or worse, till death do us part," yet 50% of marriages end in divorce. Much focus was placed on the fact that marriage should be about WE vs. me & not always putting yourself before your spouse.

I've always known that devout Christians do not believe in divorce & today I learned more about why this is the case. It was discussed that when you see your marriage as a covenant rather than a contract, you will choose to hold up your "end of the bargain" whether or not your partner is doing the same. This is where I get confused... if you legitimately fall in love with someone & get married & as the years go by, your spouse turns into a different person, someone that you didn't make that vow to, what are you to do? Stay in the marriage because you said your vows in the presence of God? How does one "hold up their end of the bargain" day in & day out when mutual respect is just not there anymore? What if your spouse becomes abusive, turns to drugs or alcohol? This is where it gets fuzzy for me.

I truly believe that marriage should be taken seriously; one should never go into marriage thinking, "well, if it doesn't work out, there's always divorce." Marriage should be based on respect for one another; without respect, you have nothing. As it was said in church today, when you are two people who come together & become united or "tied together" & you both start going in opposite directions, you will begin to play tug of war & become untied. This is where we began to talk about complete vs. compete & not living in rebellion or fighting for dominance over your spouse & about Godly mutual submission. In most relationships, you'll find that one does have a more dominant personality, but as long as balance is involved, it works.

Marriage can be wonderful, sacred & full of happiness or it can be extremely sad & lonely. It requires constant TLC; things can fall apart very quickly. I feel it's so incredibly important to LIKE your spouse as well as love them. Obviously it's not always going to be a bed of roses, but when you take a step back & look at your relationship in the big picture, you want to have more happy thoughts than sad or angry.

My question is, if you are a Christian who fully believes that you do not leave your marriage come hell or high water, what do you do when things have truly fallen apart? You're waking up each day, looking at the person laying next to you & feeling pure disdain? Trying your hardest to make things right & failing? Do you stay in that life? Or do you leave & potentially have the ability to fine true happiness?

It is my personal opinion that life is too short to be miserable. Not saying that I think marriage is just a piece of paper that should be taken lightly, but that sometimes you have to know when to say when.

A few extra hours

Why is it that other countries take time to relax & regenerate when we Americans can do nothing but work, work, work. Who's logging the longest hours in the office? Whose house is the most organized, cleanest, with perfectly well-balanced meals on the table each evening? It's all about go, go, go and I'm sick & tired of it.

This evening, Mike was busily working on dinner as I fed Cam his last bottle of the night & put him to bed. As I reached the kitchen in anticipation to eat, it was 8:45pm; such an ideal time for dinner! I noticed that Mike had re-heated a rotisserie chicken in the oven & nuked some frozen veggies that were buried in the freezer. The first thing I heard out of Mike's mouth as I sat down at the table was, "darn it, this chicken isn't even hot yet!" My response? Whatever, at this point, I just want to put food in my stomach & call it a day. So, I grabbed some chicken & moved on to the veggies. Took one bite of the veggies when I realized that they were completely freezer burned & disgusting, so into the garbage I spit them. So, what did my Thursday night dinner consist of? About 4oz of chicken breast & a glass of water. Nutrition at it's finest!

It just got me thinking, that I wish we had a few extra NON-WORKING hours each day. That would change my world! I'd be able to spend more time playing with Cam, we'd be able to eat a decent meal as a family & after Cam was asleep, we would have a good amount of downtime to do what we want. Search the internet, blog, read, catch up on out-dated magazines, etc, etc, etc.

If you had a few extra hours each night, how would you use them?

New discoveries with Cam

I realize that I am unbelievably blessed to have been given the chance to be Cameron's mom, but at the same time, I have also realized just how challenging parenthood really is. One moment you are an independent person who can come & go as you please, eat & sleep as you please, when BAM, everything changes in the blink of an eye.

I remember watching Mike leave the house for work when Cam was first born, knowing he wouldn't be back for almost 10 hours & I would feel so envious of the fact that he was able to "escape" for a while & maintain some normalcy. One can never mentally prepare just how consuming it is to take care of this new, tiny person; to be up every 2 hours during the night & running ragged all day long & to know you have to turn around & do it all over again the following day.

It was when Cam was 6 weeks old that I decided I needed to go back to work a couple times a week just to relieve some of my anxiety. During this time my many co-workers would say, "Isn't it the most rewarding job you could imagine?!" or "Aren't you just head over heels??" And as I nodded my head in agreement, feeling deliriously tired & overwhelmed, I thought to myself, "You are out of your freaking mind; this job is anything but rewarding." You work day & night, feeding, changing diapers, changing your clothes & the baby's for the third time because you're both covered in spit up yet again and all the child can do is cry. This, I must say, is not very rewarding!

But as the months passed & Cam began to sleep & develop a personality & the ability to entertain himself for more than 5 minutes, I started slowly falling into a routine where things start to become "normal" again.

Fast forward 9 months & I can actually relate to what my co-workers were saying; this IS the most rewarding job I could have. I truly began to realize that my life has a whole new meaning & my little man is relying on ME to be the best person I can be to give him the wonderful life he deserves. We are having a blast watching him learn & discover new & exciting things. Every single day is a new journey for the 3 of us & I would not trade it in for all the money in the world. Each night as I lay with Cam & feed him his last bottle, I thank God for giving me such a gift.

But does this mean it's now all peaches & cream? Heck no! I never received my book, "Your Complete Guide to being the PERFECT Parent" so each day I question & doubt myself. I just have to continue to repeat, "you will NEVER EVER be perfect & it's okay!" All I can do is my best & that's what I'm doing.

So, if you're a parent who is feeling overwhelmed or inadequate, you are NOT alone. Just smile & nod at the person who tells you that being a parent is so completely magical, blissful & serene. It's a wild ride filled with many ups & downs, twists & turns, but mostly ups. Today happened to be one of those days where everything just clicked; we had a fantastic day at the Florida Aquarium & Cam had a blast. Watching him discover all these new creatures was amazing & made me feel like a kid again! So I can now say that being Cam's mom is THE best.

So hard to say good-bye

Yesterday was a very bittersweet day. We were celebrating Father's Day which was a lot of fun, especially since it was Mike's first. But it was also a very sad day because we had to say goodbye to our Pudgey Bear. Pudge has been a part of our lives for the past 16 years and he has given us a million & one wonderful memories and smiles. He is the BEST dog in the world & he will NEVER be forgotten; no other dog could ever replace Pudge since he is one of a kind. Pudge will be going to Heaven today where he will again be a young puppy, able to run around and tear up paper like he has always loved to do. I know he'll be watching down on our family, knowing that he will always be in our hearts and memories. It was so heartbreaking to say goodbye for the last time, but we all knew that this was the right thing to do. We know that he'll be making many people happy in Heaven & he'll be sitting beside my grandpa like he always used to. I love you so much Pudge!

I know Cameron won't remember you but we will all share your stories and pictures with him. Our hearts are broken right now, but we are happy that you will be in a better place with no pain or discomfort. Tears stream down my face as I write this, but my heart is at peace knowing that we gave you the best life you could have been given & you gave us so much happiness and love in return. Goodbye for now, Pudge, we love you with all our hearts.


Last chance to cuddle


We will miss you SO much


The brothers & sisters


Love you, Pudgey Bear!

Relationships + baby = challenge!

It's my opinion that a marriage always needs TLC in order to stay successful. It's very easy to fall into a monotonous routine where you slowly begin to drift apart before you even noticed a problem. Put a baby into the mix & it's that much easier to fall apart. Some people may be fooled into thinking that a baby will bring an already troubled relationship together when it will actually do the opposite. I feel lucky knowing that our relationship was strong when Cam entered this world. Having a baby instantly spins your life in a whole new direction & sleepless night, after sleepless night causes your priorities to shift. I personally went into survival mode when Cameron came along; taking a shower & getting dressed would equate to a successful day. Sexy is the LAST thought that came to mind after Cam was born; swollen, leaky boobs anyone? Ripped up who-ha after pushing out a baby whose head circumference happens to be in the 98th percentile? Stay far, far away, hubby!

Now that I'm back to work full-time, it's definitely a challenge to live up to my almost impossible standards. By the time Mike & I get home, it's a mad rush to get Cam fed, bathed, spend time playing, etc, etc, etc. By the time the dust settles, it leaves very little downtime for the two of us to connect. Not to mention that we both like to do separate things to wind down; I'm a reader or I watch my own shows, Mike likes the internet, X-box & shows I'm just not into. Before I know it, Thursday rolls around when I realize that we haven't spend any quality time together.

One of the many baby books I have read is Babywise & I completely agree with their philosophy that "great marriages create great parents." Not only marriages, but also other relationships; the fact that I'm now a mom doesn't mean I'm no longer a friend, daughter, career-woman, etc! I have always vowed to keep my own identity after having children & so far I think I'm doing a decent job of it. Not to say that I don't struggle with guilt or question myself on a daily basis; am I ever doing enough?? Will I ever be completely satisfied?

Way too fast!

These days it seems that time is slipping by too quickly & Cameron is growing up too fast. I remember the first couple months of his life, wishing he would be a bit older so we could interact with him more & he would sleep better. Happily, I can report that he is sleeping like a champ; 10-12 hours per night vs. 2-3 hour stretches. And as far as interacting? The kid is freakin hilarious! Who ever knew someone so small could make me laugh so hard. It literally amazes me that a baby so young could have SUCH a personality.

It seems that each day Cam comes home from day care, he looks bigger & seems to be able to do that much more. His 2 bottom teeth are fully in & his top two are really coming along. He's able to move from one end of the room to the other in no time at all & anything that is NOT a toy is his favorite thing. As soon as Grammy Pernecky comes in, we can fully focus on getting the house baby-proofed.

I'm trying my best to savor each moment I spend with Cam & enjoy each stage of his development. Being Cam's mom is the most incredible blessing I could have been given in the entire world & I thank God for him everyday.

"Going Green." Just do it & shut up already!

In watching an episode of Jon & Kate Plus 8, it reminded me of just how overused the term "going green" is. Being environmentally friendly is our duty as people living on this Earth, yet somehow it's become more of a trendy thing. In this particular episode, Jon & Kate happened to be getting solar panels installed on their roof & I swear, if I heard Kate utter those 2 words one more time, I was going to regurgitate my dinner. Yes, if I was paid oodles of money to have my life filmed & things were given to me for free, I could be much more "green" (gag) than I am now. It also seems that the people on tv & in magazines who talk about being green are the ones getting on their private jets for a date night in another city or hopping from plane to plane to promote a book. Being good to our environment is not something we should be bragging about, it should be something we just do. I recycle, keep my water use to a minimum, turn off unnecessary lights, use energy efficient light bulbs, etc, etc & I do not expect a pat on the back for it.

In subscribing to Domino magazine, I often read about "green" homes. It takes a whole lotta cash to really make your home environmentally friendly. I personally do not have the funds to replace my fully functioning appliances with energy efficient versions. Nor can I trade in my car for a hybrid. But, I can do the things within my means to treat Mother Earth with respect. We are given one planet to live on & we should treat it well, gosh darn it! No one thanks us for washing our hands after using the facilities, do they?! Nope. That's because it's expected of us, just as keeping our Earth clean should be.

So to all of you out there, try & find something in your life that you can do to make a difference. Even if it's just turning the water off while brushing your teeth. Our goal, in the Perno household is to seal any gaps in the doors/windows to prevent cool air from escaping. We also plan on having the energy company assess our house which will benefit our wallets & our Earth. My personal goal is to stop using Styrofoam cups for water at work.

I would love to hear less talk & see more action so please be nice to our planet & then shut the hell up about it! Peace out, homies!

The last week of my 20s

As I sit here at 11:11pm (make a wish!) on this Sunday night, I realize that one week from today I will be 30. I remember being a kid thinking that I would never get old, feeling like time stood still. Now it seems that I wish time would slow down; sometimes I can't even remember what month it is. I just feel like I want to savor time instead of wishing my life away. I'm the type of person who always looks ahead & I don't want to look back at my life years from now wishing I had just enjoyed being in the moment. So, it is my wish that this decade will be more about enjoying each day & each moment. So many things have changed over the past 10 years; at this time 10 years ago, I was in an apartment in college with my friend Amanda. I still had 2 years of school + my dietetic internship ahead of me. I was 3 years away from marrying Mike & 9 years away from having my first child. Who knows what the next 10 years will bring?!

I hope for good health & happiness to those that I love. I wish for my baby boy to have the best life that we can give him. I look forward to watching him grow & seeing our friends & family grow in size as they have children (or more) too. This is a very big year/decade for me as I am now accountable for a life other than my own. I have a little boy (who happens to be sleeping in the next room) who is relying on me. I look forward to many more adventures & experiences!

The joys of day care! The uncertainty of parenthood!

Any parent can attest that sending your child to day care can be a stressful situation. You're letting go of the control you had while being home with the baby, hoping the baby will stay on a good schedule. Then they go to day care where you see a bunch of little faces looking up at you with gobs of snots dripping from their noses. And you think to yourself, "well, it's only a matter of time until my baby gets sick."

For us, that time came pretty quickly! Cam got his first cold which lasted three weeks; he even needed to be on Albuterol nebulizer treatments. Then he kicked that cold, stayed home with his Grammy for a couple of weeks and BAM! within a couple weeks of being back, the sniffles started again. Now we're back into a full blown cold with fever.

So... we send our children to day care so that we can go to work & make a living to support our family. But then we can't work when they get sick even though they contracted the sickness from day care! You just can't win! Mike had to leave work early today because Cam was running a fever & he'll be taking tomorrow off as well since a child can't come back unless the fever has been gone for 24 hours. I know that kids will get sick at some point & it will be either now or when they start kindergarten, but it can be very stressful!

But to all you parents or parents-to-be who will eventually need day care, try not to fret! There are definite positives about it: 1) Baby learns to socialize at a young age 2) Less likely to develop seperation anxiety 3) Baby gets to watch kids in other developmental stages & may be more encouraged to roll, crawl, walk, etc. 4) It allows Mom or Dad to have a life outside the house which may help you appreciate your baby more than if you were together 24/7.

And to all you stay-at-home moms or dads, hats of to you because that is probably the hardest job you can have! I would probably end up in a mental institute if I had to stay home all day with my baby. Don't get me wrong, I love Cam more than anything in the world but I'm a person that needs to have time for myself in the working world.

It basically boils down to the fact that when you become a parent, so many things change regardless if you work or stay at home. You always question yourself; am I spending enough quality time with the baby? Should I skip cooking dinner & play with the baby or let the baby watch a Baby Einstein video? And I know that no matter what age/stage your child is in, there will always be concerns or challenges; they may be different, but they're still there. Being a parent is a challenge, but at the same time, it is the best gift you can be given. Looking at your baby, knowing that you created him (or her), is the most amazing feeling in the world. It's something I will never take for granted.

So, let's all hope that Cam can kick the crap out of this sickness he's currently fighting with!